Our new patio

Update: I found the pictures I was missing, so I've edited them in below (they were hiding on Facebook).

In my post on installing our rain barrel, I indicated that we now have a new patio. For a while we had wanted to remove our deck and replace it with a nice patio so it was exciting when we finally had enough money to get the job done.

Our fantastic neighbour, Tim, took charge on the project as our contractor and oversaw the effort of removing the deck and replacing it with a poured concrete patio. There were some issues we faced with the company responsible for pouring the concrete (if I could remember their name, I would tell you to avoid them, but I cannot right now), but Tim and I overcame those issues and he was able to get the patio finished.

The design for the patio was an amalgamation of ideas from myself, Chrissy and Tim. Here is a rough sketch to give you an idea of before and after (Tip: Make sure you have sketches, it will save time explaining what you want and help avoid conflict on the job). This does not show the height difference between the deck with its high railings and the patio. Also, this is not to scale, the patio is actually bigger than the deck, but my sketching abilities are inadequate.

Sketched plan of the deck before and patio after
Sketched plan of the deck before and patio after
The deck
The deck

Once the deck was removed (and some conflict had been ironed out over the shape), the patio and steps were framed and leveled ready for the concrete to be poured.

Patio framed ready for concrete
Patio framed ready for concrete

The concrete was coloured so that once finished, it would look somewhat stone-like. Once the concrete had time to dry, the framing was removed.

The patio before landscaping or final finish
The patio before landscaping or final finish

At this point, our neighbour took over and started to work on the finish. In the above photo, you may be able to just make out a grind stone which Tim used to slough off the rough burrs and blemishes so that we had a more appealing surface. He then applied a top coat to level out any big imperfections. Finally, two different colour powders were added to give more of a stone-effect before the whole thing was coated in a protective seal that also had gold flecks mixed in to catch the sunlight.

With the patio surface finished, Tim suggested we get some crushed concrete to pack around the patio, providing additional support and reducing the amount of space that would need filling with topsoil. Several tons of topsoil were distributed to landscape around the new patio. Although the patio was much lower than the deck (the deck had been at the same level as the back door), the slope of the back yard meant that the patio was up to 11 inches higher than the surround lawn in some areas. This meant that several cycles of dumping, raking and compacting soil were used to create a nice, sturdy transition from patio to lawn. In hindsight, I would have used more of the crushed concrete or some other filler and less topsoil, but it worked out.

After landscapting with soil, putting down weed blocker and new borders
After landscapting with soil, putting down weed blocker and new borders

While moving the soil around, we also added a new bed to the right of the backdoor and extended an existing bed on the far side of the patio to come around the front. They were covered with weed blocking membrane in preparation for plants. These are clearer to see in the next photo which was taken after I had sown grass seed.

Patio with grass seed sown
Patio with grass seed sown

While we waited for the grass to grow, we started work on the beds. A few plants were acquired from a vendor at Ann Arbor Farmers Market as well as some white marble chips to go around them. Unfortunately, we didn't really work the ground properly or put enough weed blocker down, so we now have white marble peppered with crab grass. In hindsight, we should have treated the soil with Round Up first (or a similar product) to kill everything before we put the weed blocker and marble down. New plants could have waited. Instead, we will be tasked with tearing up all the marble and weed blocker this spring or summer so that we can lay a thicker layer or perhaps, go the Round Up route if none of the new plants survived the winter.

Grass growing, beds planted and marble chips put down
Grass growing, beds planted and marble chips put down

I will perhaps go into the plants we got after they have had chance to attempt surviving their first Michigan winter (they just got reburied by snow this morning), until then, just know that they live (I think) as does the grass.

Grass growing around the patio. From left to right: Chrissy, Nico (our neighbours' cat), Barry and Shaun.
Grass growing around the patio. From left to right: Chrissy, Nico (our neighbours' cat), Barry and Shaun.

We are very happy with how this has turned out and look forward to getting some nice patio furniture for the summer (and maybe even a grill1). We might even have an English tea party to christen it.

  1. Barbecue for my non-American readers. []

CodeMash 2.0.1.3

I cannot praise the board members of CodeMash (@codemash) enough; this year was yet another excellent conference. Rather than focus on all the things I did at CodeMash this year, I want to focus on a single thread that made CodeMash special for me. I realise I'm a little late getting round to this considering the conference was in January, but I want to tell you about me winning the Pecha Kucha contest of CodeMash 2.0.1.3.

Public Speaking 101

On the first day, I decided I was going to attend the Choose Your Own Application precompiler1 session in the afternoon, but I was unsure of how to spend my morning. After perusing the other precompiler sessions, I decided to check out Leon Gersing's (@rubybuddha) workshop on public speaking. Though I fully intended to ditch this class midway through to continue my day with Brian Genisio (@BrianGenisio) and Dennis Burton (@dburton), Leon's workshop was so compelling and enjoyable, I couldn't do it. His background in theatre coupled with his patient, consistent and insightful coaching style ensured that attendees became comfortable with speaking (and sometimes singing) in front of one another. Though I attended some great sessions, had some great conversations and ate some awesome bacon, this workshop was my favourite experience of CodeMash. I doubt there were few, if any people who left that workshop not intending to do more public speaking at some point.

During the class we were tasked with putting together a five minute presentation about anything at all and delivering it to the class for critique about our presentation style and habits. My choice of in-class talk had been a toss-up between something about building a raised bed and something about British slang. Given the potentially offensive minefield of the latter and the fact that I already had a blog of material about the former, I babbled about DIY for five minutes in class and gained an disproportionate level of confidence about my abilities in public speaking. Running off the high I had gained from delivering an impromptu five minute gardening lesson, I decided to enter the Pecha Kucha contest with a presentation on British slang. After all, why offend a small room of forgiving workshop attendees when you can offend a much larger room of conference attendees?

Pecha Kucha

Pecha Kucha is a presentation contest where you get 20 slides that auto-advance at 20 seconds per slide. It's a battle of timing, content and delivery. For those who attended last year, you may remember the Urinal Rules Kata slide deck from Mel Grubb, Jon Skeet's Coding in the Style of Glee or Leon Gersing and his Pecha Kucha on Love. I felt that all three of these had set the bar pretty high, so I stayed up till 4:00 AM on Wednesday night agonising over what to include in my slides. I had decided to focus on areas of British slang that might be common pitfalls for Americans. I also wanted to avoid anything that might be directly offensive to the non-British audience (my apologies to Jon Skeet and other Brits that were in attendance). By 4:00 AM, with my slide deck almost complete, I fell asleep.

The next morning, I submitted my presentation title, "The Dog's Bollocks", to the contest so that  conference attendees could vote. The plan was that presentations with the highest number of votes would get to present in the main hall just after dinner. I checked my tally over the course of the morning and noted that I was not getting many votes. This was probably because my title flew in the face of what we had discussed in class; titles should give an indication as to the subject of the talk.

As the day wore on, my late night caught up with me and  I decided to go for a nap sometime around midday. While I was asleep, my friends pimped my talk all over the Kalahari resort, so I awoke a few hours later to my phone buzzing with text messages to let me know I was presenting in the contest. I had less than an hour to finish my presentation, but with a few edits and some new slides, I did so. Once the deck was submitted and at the insistence of my friend, I performed a couple of rehearsals in our hotel room as he grinned back at me with the most disconcerting of smiles and then we headed off for dinner and the main event.

The Main Event

After dessert, all the contestants gathered near the stage and determined in what order we would present. I have no idea what that order was, just that I wasn't first, I wasn't last and Jon Skeet was after me (I know this because he cleverly borrowed a bit of my talk to end his own, for which I was really flattered). All the talks varied wildly in both content and delivery, leaving a somewhat difficult choice for the audience to make when voting. In the end, it was determined that I and Jessica Kerr (@jessitron) were the most popular entries and so, we had to contend with the battle deck in order to determine a winner.

The battle deck consisted of ten slides, chosen by Brian Prince (@brianhprince), that neither I nor Jessica saw before presenting them. In the end, my battle deck performance swayed the audience just enough and I won the contest. I thanked Leon Gersing, my public speaking coach of two days earlier, several times after I won as I would not have done so if I had not attended his workshop and nor if he had been participating instead of compering.

Ocular Proof

I've included videos of my main talk and my battle deck performance below. I recommend that you hunt down videos of the other performances if you can as there were some great ones (I'll add any that I find or that you send me).

Also, you may note (as others have) that "Pigs" is slang to both the British and Americans. Due to last minute edits, this one slipped through. What can I say? I was tired.

  1. CodeMash lingo for the first two days of the conference. []

Learning Poetry: Exercise 3

This is the third part in a series of posts documenting my efforts learning more about prosody:

It has been a while since I posted about learning poetry through Stephen Fry's excellent The Ode Less Travelled: Unlocking the Poet Within. I'm not trying to recreate his book, so you may want to get your own copy to follow along in more detail, but as with previous posts in this series, I will try to outline the intent of the exercise before my attempts and any discussion thereof.

The Exercise

The third exercise I have attempted (the fourth exercise in the book) brings together all the different elements of iambic pentameter1 learned so far: pyrrhic2 and trochaic3 substitutions, weak/feminine endings4, enjambment5 and caesura6. The challenge is to write 16 lines of iambic pentameter using these variations without losing the iambic rhythm with points being awarded accordingly; five points for the substitutions and two points for enjambment or weak endings. I'll deduct points where the iambic rhythm is left wanting.

The Result

Brilliant lights are shining down on me
tonight, but I believe I might be high.
Perhaps I'll take a chance on this young lady,
if she will take a chance on this young man.

Although she is my wife I know my chances
are not as good as I had hoped they'd be.
It seems she may have spotted my intentions,
I may have blown my shot when I burned lunch.

I'll post the words I've written on my blog,
so you can judge if I followed the rules.
I'm watching Talladega Nights on Crackle,
trying to get this up to sixteen lines.

A knife will soon be sticking into Ricky
Bobby, his screams will curdle blood for some.
Barry the cat is eating food and drinking
water, while I am watching from afar.

The Score

Of course, as with most arty things, the analysis is subjective. You may disagree with my scansion and therefore the points I awarded myself. Please, leave a comment on how you might score my effort. Also, have a try yourself and post your own attempts for this exercise.

In order to score this, we first must determine where the stresses are in each line and mark the various substitutions and such. I will highlight the stresses that I feel are there above the text using / for stressed syllables and – for unstressed.

 /  -  -     /    -   /   -    /   -  /
Brilliant lights are shining down on me (5)
 -  /     -  /  -  /   -   /    -   /
tonight, but I believe I might be high. (2)

The first line starts with a trochee (tum-ti), that's five points and there is an enjambment too for an additional two. No loss of the iambic rhythm so no points docked here.

 -  /    -     /  -    /    -   /    -   / (-)
Perhaps I'll take a chance on this young lady, (2)
 -   /   -    /  -    /    -   /     -   /
if she will take a chance on this young man. (0)

Here we have a hendecasyllabic line (a weak ending) but nothing else interesting. Just two points.

 -    /    -   -  -   /  -   /   -   / (-)
 Although she is my wife I know my chances (7)
  -   /   -   /   - /  -    /     -     /
 are not as good as I had hoped they'd be. (2)

There's a phyrric substitution, weak ending and enjambment going on here.

 -    /   -   /   -   /  -  -  - /  (-)
 It seems she may have spotted my intentions, (7)
 -   /   -    /    -   /    -   /   /     /
 I may have blown my shot when I burned lunch. (-2)

I like the first of these two lines. At first glance, one is tempted to put stress on "my", but I think you'll agree that it flows much better if there's a phyrric substition here. Add that five points to the two for the weak ending and we have seven points. The second line left me in a quandry as one could read it in so many different ways. Is "when I" phyrric or iambic? Is "burned lunch" an iamb or a spondee7? I think it's a spondaic substitution and have marked it as such. Unfortunately, there is no prize for spondees in this exercise so I have docked myself two points here (I didn't dock 5 as I feel that the iambic metre remains intact, despite the errant spondee).

  -    /    -    /     -   -   -   /  -  /
 I'll post the words I've written on my blog, (5)
 -    /  -    /   -  /  -    -   -    /
 so you can judge if I followed the rules. (5)

These lines are both straightforward with a single phyrric substitution in each for a total of 10 points.

  -   /    -   / - / -    /    -   /  (-)
 I'm watching Talladega Nights on Crackle, (2)
  /  -   -  /   -    /  -  /   /    /
 trying to get this up to sixteen lines. (3)

The first line here is hendecasyllabic for two points and the second line starts with a trochaic substitution for another five. However, I'm fairly confident that the second line ends with a spondaic substution as in "to sixteen lines". It does seem to be written rather emphatically as though exasperated at the size of the challenge. For this, I docked myself two points as spondees are not part of the challenge. What do you think? Was I too harsh on myself? Should I not have docked points for a spondee?

-   /    -     /   -   /   -   / -  / (-)
A knife will soon be sticking into Ricky (2)
 /  -   -     /      -    / -    /    -    /
Bobby, his screams will curdle blood for some. (7)
 /  -   -   /  -  /  -    /   -    /  (-)
Barry the cat is eating food and drinking (9)
 / -     /   -  -  /   -     /  - /
water, while I am watching from afar. (10)

For the closing verse, we have a weak ending in the first line, a trochaic substitution at the start of the second and the third with another weak ending and two enjambments, and that's all before the final line. The last line starts with two trochaic substitutions before returning to the familiar iambic measure. I feel that this actually works without losing the overall rhythm, so I've given myself 10 points for the two substitutions.

Adding that all up, I get 66 points. Do you agree with how I scored myself? Did you try this exercise for yourself? If so, please post your efforts in the comments and don't forget to let me know if you're following along in the book.

  1. Verse with the metre 'ti-tum ti-tum ti-tum ti-tum ti-tum', also known as the Heroic Line. []
  2. A phyrrus is two weak syllables together as in 'ti ti'. []
  3. A trochee is a strong syllable followed by a weak one as in 'tum-ti'. []
  4. An extra, weak syllable is added to the end of a line; 'ti-tum ti-tum ti-tum ti-tum ti-tum ti'. Also known as hendecasyllabic. []
  5. Where the meaning runs on from one line to the next. []
  6. Pauses, which break up the flow. []
  7. A spondee is two stressed syllables together as in 'tum tum'. []